Sundance and back again

Yeah.  Just got back from Sundance.  Actually, when I say Sundance, I mean The Sundance Film Festival, which takes place in Park City, Utah, and not in Sundance, Utah.  These poor suckers were walkilng up the street and asked me where they could find "the screening room", and I asked which one.. then they showed me their ticket, and then it was put upon ME to be the bearer of bad news:  It was 15 minutes before their film was to start, but they were 45 minutes away from the theatre.  So being familiar with the expression about messenger, I wasn't about to let them shoot me, so I launched into an attack on them:  How could you be so irresponsible?.......  What is wrong with you? ..... Are you all idiots? ..... Noone, not ONE of you could look into the information on the theatre?!....  Look how Ugly you are!....  Especially you!...... Do you call that a haircut?......I think that haircut actually makes your hair SMELL bad as well!...  That's nice of you to support retards, but why not let them just read to you or something.....Why are you hitting yourself?!.............I think it worked for the most part.  They didn't get mad at me.  Maybve I could have done without getting all personal. Especially towards the little 6 year old boy with the bad haircut...  but I mean come ON!.. You would understand if you saw that haircut!